A little bit of comic relief

My dear friend Kara has been sweet to provide me with some very entertaining emails while I've been here in the hospital to keep me laughing. I thought I would share one. Hilarious!! Of course, it so appropriately has to do with pregnancy :-)

PREGNANCY QUICKIES

What is the most common pregnancy craving?

For men to be the ones who get pregnant

When is the best time to get an epidural?

Right after you find out you're pregnant

Does labor cause hemorrhoids?

Labor cause anything you want to blame it for.

When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?

When the kids are in college.

How long is the average woman in labor?

Whatever she says, divided by two.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a Playboy centerfold?

Nothing, if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him.

What position should the baby be in during the ninth month of pregnancy?

Head down, pressing firmly on your bladder.

What do you call a pregnancy that begins while using birth control?

A misconception.